ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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