sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
