saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
