how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I need a beard to bite.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
