Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
