I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
