you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
