Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
