Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
