You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
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