We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
