so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
