No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
either way he was missing a nipple.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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