she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize