Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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