Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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