I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
should my penis look like a turkey
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
