You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
