p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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