Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize