What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
