Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
vagina is talking i cant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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