yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize