my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
