She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
17 year olds will be the death of me.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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