Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
