what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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