I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
