I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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