I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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