we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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