my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
