I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Randomize
