You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
