It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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