Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
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Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
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You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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