69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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