i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
