I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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