My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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