Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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