so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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