Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm too high and old for this...
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
