I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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