So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
