Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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