Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
