well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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