i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize