I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
